My mom became a mother on August 12, 1980 at 8:05 a.m. – at 19 years old – alone in a hospital room with my grandma standing outside waiting for them to say it was ok to come in.  My mom will tell a story of the night of August 11th when there were horrible storms passing through Madison County, trees were down, thunder and lightening everywhere…and she began having contractions about midnight. 

The contractions weren’t a surprise to her, as her baby was due on August 15th.  At 18 years old, just graduating high school – my mom met a very nice man who had a 10 year old daughter.  In a very short amount of time, my mom was expecting a baby. 

I’m sure my grandparents were very disappointed, but I can almost surely hear my grandma saying “it’s gonna be alright, we’ll just get thru this and everything will work out.”  Just as every other 18 year old, I’m sure my mom thought that life would be great, everything would work out –

She and her boyfriend ended up getting married, because of the pregnancy – and obviously back then  you nearly had to.  So she got married and waited patiently for August to come.  Because they didn’t have ultra sounds for “normal pregnancies” back then, my mom only had one, very early on – and they couldn’t determine whether her baby was a boy or a girl.  She hoped for a girl.

Just as time passes, people change and life continues to go on – my mom went into labor at my grandparents house on August 11th.  My grandpa was a semi driver and was out on the road somewhere.  As for my biological dad – as the story goes… he was a semi driver too and was in Kentucky at the time.  So, my grandma drove my mom to the hospital.  At 8:05 a.m. – my mom delivered a 6 pound 10 ounce baby girl.  And named her Ginny Marie.

I can’t imagine what my mom went thru, laying in a hospital room alone holding me for the first few moments and realizing that her entire life had just changed.  Life as she knew it, would never be the same.  But I know that my grandma was there with her the whole time, supporting her – regardless of the circumstances of my birth.

It took my biological dad 2 or 3 days to make it to the hospital to see me.  So, as my baby book shows – my mom greeted several visitors there to support this young mother in the birth of her baby girl. 

In an effort to try to make things work with my biological dad, she moved to Texas when I was about 6 months old and stayed there for about a year.  I’ve heard stories of what happened, but I don’t know for sure, but I know that my grandpa got in his Old Dodge Truck and my grandma in her car and drove straight thru to Houston Texas to pick me and my mom up and bring us home.

…and that was the end of that.

My biological dad was never involved after that time.  My mom lived with my grandma and grandpa until she married my step dad in late 1984.  I know that my grandma took care of me a lot to help my mom out while i was little.  And I know my mom was so thankful for that.

My mom stayed married to my step dad (who later adopted me when my biological dad signed off his rights) for 10 years.  When I came back from my 22 day trip to Europe at 13 years old, my mom and “dad” told me they were getting divorced.

So, again – my mom was on her own.  And she did everything she could to take care of me.  She ended up getting a better job than she had when they were married and somehow made the ends meet.  Raising a teenage daughter on your own surely was difficult but it all worked out.  And I know she made  lot of sacrifices so that I could be happy during my high school years and beyond.  Luckily, my step dad remained involved during that time – so she had financial help.

I went to college and after 2 years of college, had to sit down with my mom and my boyfriend (who i’d been with for a year and a half at the time)… and tell her that we were expecting.

When much of my family turned their back on me for getting pregnant… my mom was right there to support me.  I know it was difficult for her, given the fact that I had so much ahead of me – but at the same time she knew that my boyfriend came from a good family and that everything would work out alright.

I was due September 27, 2000.  I called my boyfriend about 10 a.m. after he’d already left for work and told him that i’d meet him at his job and we could drive to the hospital because i wasn’t feeling well at all.  When we realized they were keeping me to deliver that day – we called my mom and told her not to rush, we’d probably be there for a while!  She called to check in about 4 pm and we told her that things were going along just fine.  She immediately called my grandparents who lived near Ft. Wayne and they headed to Anderson.

I became a mother on September 11th, 2000 at 6:45 pm to the most perfect little 8 pound baby boy in the world.  Just after 7 p.m. we were greeted by so many people who had supported us the entire time.  Loved us when despite our “mistake” and wanted to share in our joy all the same.

The first few people in the door were my mom and grandma, once again – right there waiting to see the newest member of our family.  And right then, as I held my own son for the first time, i realized what unconditional love is all about.  I realized that it’s loving through hurt, through disappointment and that it never fails.  I realized that right then and there, despite the people who’d turned their back and chosen not to support me in that time of my life…. my son had everyone he needed in his life.  And I was so thankful.

Shortly after, my grandparents moved to Anderson and got to enjoy my son quite a bit.  He spent the night often at their apartment and they babysat him every now and then.  I am so thankful for that.

I became a mother for the second time on February 5th, 2004.  One day overdue!!!  …to the most precious little girl i’d ever seen!  Again, the very same people were right there to support me.

My grandma helped me out INCREDIBLY during that time.  When I first brought my daughter home from the hospital it was just she and I.  And it was horrible!!!  I couldnt’ get her to sleep, I was sore, tired and emotionally drained.  We spent several of our nights sleeping at my grandma’s so she could help me out at night with the baby.  At one point, after about a week and a half, my grandma took Bekah in her room with her and said “you get some sleep – i’ll come get you if she’s hungry…”.  And I got to sleep 5 hours that night.  I will never forget the way(s) that my grandma helped me out during those times in my life.  I don’t have any idea how i would’ve made it without her help.  During the time in her life where she was retired, should’ve been enjoying her life …. she was helping me out day in and day out while i was on maternity leave.  Cooking me healthy meals to make sure I was eating well enough to nurse my baby.  Selflessly.  Lovingly.  And Gracefully. 

…and that’s why I try so hard to help people when they are in need.  I will never forget the people that have helped me when i’ve been in need and I just want to pass that kindness on to others.  I was raised by two of the most amazing women ever.  The things they’ve shown me, the sacrifice and the example are like a stellar performance in an impromptu play.

Today, we spent Mother’s Day at my grandma’s house for dinner.  I took a few pictures of everyone this year, because you never know when the golden chain of life will end. 

My Grandma Evelyn and my Daughter Bekah

 

Meet my grandparents, Grandma Evelyn and Grandpa Blaine.  Two of the few people that have shown me unconditional love since day 1.  Never being influenced negatively by my decisions, always there to support and enjoy my life… and truly the only constant in my childhood.

 

My family. 

My Uncle Andy passed away unexpectedly in 2001 .  And although it was sad for all of us, we will never know how it feels to bury your child.  So this is my family (minus my cousins Jeremy and Jason).

My mom Becky, My Grandma Evelyn and Grandpa Blaine

 

And finally –

These are the hands that have shown so much love.  The hands of mothers that love their children dearly, accept them as they are and give selflessly so they can be happy.  These are the hands that have clasped together, praying for good things to come in the bad times.  The hands that held their children, grandchildren and great-grandbabies.  The hands that worked hard for a living so that their family could be taken care of.  These are the hands that tell a story of unconditional love.  The hands that have taught me how to love my children always, no matter what.  The hands that have shown me how to do for others, humbly and with humility – always serve others.

It started with my grandma, who gave birth to my mother, who gave birth to me.  Someday, my hand will be on the bottom, with a few stacked on top.  And I hope my hand has shown the amount of love of the hands beneath mine…

Happy Mother’s Day…

 

Mom and Grandma, you’ll never know what you mean to me, what I’ve learned from you and how much I love you.

“I love you…

a bushel and a peck. 

A bushel and a peck…

and a hug around the neck. 

A barrel and a heap.

A barrel and a heap…

And I’m talkin’ in my sleep.

…about youuuuuuu.”

 

-my mom and grandma have sung that song to me for years.. and now i sing it to my kids.  It makes me happy.